Don’t Proctor & Gamble with your floor!

About eighteen months ago, we had a hardwood floor put in. It was an engineered Laminated product, and when completed it looked beautiful. I remember putting on a pair of clean white socks and “skating” on it.

Recently, however, it has started looking decidedly faded, and seems to stain easily. Whether you are wearing shoes, socks or are barefoot, it leaves unsightly marks, and your shoes/socks/feet “stick” the the floor.

We had been using a wet Swiffer on it once a week to keep it clean - the product is advertised as being “suitable for Hardwood Floors”, but when I did a little googling I came across several websites that all said “Do not use a wet swiffer”.

Now they tell me.

I also found a lot of recommendations to use this product, from a Swedish company called Bona (which sounds rude if you pronounce it carelessly). A mopping kit cost $35, and I was able to pick one up from a local Hardware Store.

Last night I tried it out for the first time. The verdict: “We have a winner!”. While the results were not perfect, they were a major improvement - it will take a good few applications to remove the accumulated gunk of a year and a half of Swiffer debris, but already the floor is a little less sticky in the area I tested.

I’ll follow up with subsequent comments on this one.

Now reading: How to think like Leonardo Da Vinci

How to keep my business

It never ceases to amaze me how corporations will spend huge amounts of money to win new customers, but once they have your business they act like they are entitled to it, thus losing the most important marketing tool of all - word of mouth. Here are some of the ways that you can impress me.

• Don’t hide from me! Too many businesses have an attitude that can be summed up as “give-us-your-money-but-don’t-talk-to-us”. They bury phone numbers deep within their websites and hide contact info, perhaps in the hope that you won’t ever trouble them again.
• Pick up the phone! Part I : “Press 1 for the runaround, press two for a total waste of time. If you want to talk to a real person you are out of luck”
• Pick up the phone! Part II : Don’t tell me that “Call Volume is high” unless you are going to tell me when it is not high. Don’t tell me that “All of our operators/associates/peons/slaves are busy” unless you are going to tell me when they are not busy or will offer a callback. Both of those phrases mean the same thing: We do not employ enough people and we’re hoping you don’t notice.
• Indian Call Centers? Just Say NO! A lot of business farm out customer service and support to India. The first sign of this is when they pick up and give their name - and you know that’s not their real name. Think about it: the first thing that they tell you is a lie… and it usually goes downhill from there.
• Answer the question! When e-mailing, I don’t mind getting an auto-generated “we-got-your-message” reply, but I would appreciate it if the subsequent reply was read and replied to with something that was not spat out of a boilerplate-cut-and-paste machine.
• Share the love - and the paperless savings! “Going Paperless” may be and added convenience for me, but is a massive cost savings for you. So why not cut me in on those savings? A one-off $20 bonus - or $5 annually - should cover it.

Now reading: Me, myself and Bob, by Phil Vischer

A Tale of Three Banks

Bank A - Thank you and good night.

I’ve been with bank “A” since August 1999. In December 2007 I got a letter from them informing me that they were switching my account to a new account in January. On examining the documentation more closely, I was incensed to find that the account that they were switching me to carried with it a $15 monthly charge that they generously waived for the first six months.

To say that I was not best pleased would be a massive understatement.

I phoned Customer Service, and spoke with “Tony”. He informed me that it would be impossible to keep my old account, because all accounts were being “harmonized”. An interesting choice of words; you might think it harmony to charge me to the tune (geddit?) of $15/month, but for me it sounds like discord.

The following day, I arrived home to find a message from an employee of this bank. I called back a few days later, but she was off that day. I left a message for her to call me. I never heard from her.

I resolved to change banks before that charge reared its ugly head.

Bank B - Wonderful people, broken system.

My first port of call was the local branch of a major national bank. Their website mentioned that they would pay a $100 bonus if I opened a new account and set up Direct Deposit—hey, a hundred bucks to do something I was going to do anyway can’t be bad, so…

1/23: Went into my local branch to open an account. After about a three-minute wait I was ushered into an office where the Manager greeted me and gave me options and details. I decided that this bank would be as good as any other, so off we go.

When I mentioned the $100 bonus she claimed not to know about it—she thought it was $75, then she checked the website. (Did I mention that she was the manager?) We shall see…

Anyway, she took my details, did her due diligence, and had me input my PIN. When signing the paperwork, I noticed that my middle initial was wrong. I mentioned this to her. She did not say anything, but typed a few keys on her computer; I assumed that she had made the correction. She also took my opening balance ($20) and ordered my first batch of checks. I asked if I could specify the starting number, and she said “no”, they start at 500.

Time spent: 30 minutes.

1/25: Went online to set up web access to my account. The website gave two ways to set up online banking: The first was “I have my Debit Card“, and required Debit Card Number, PIN, SSN and Account number; the second was “I don’t have a Debit Card“, and required SSN, PIN and Account number. Since my debit card had not arrived yet, I took the second option.

It didn’t work.

Naturally I called customer service. After being told that my call was important (but not important, enough, evidently, to warrant hiring sufficient staff), I was told that the second option was for those who had not been issued with a debit card. Since a Debit card had issued I had to wait till the card arrived and use that option.

Suggestion: Change the wording to “I have/have not been issued with a debit card“. That would have saved me a lot of time and trouble.

Time wasted: 45 minutes.

1/26: Good news: my debit card arrived - YAY! Bad news: unfortunately the card still had the wrong middle initial. Whatever the manager had done, the name on the account was still wrong.

Phoned up customer service. Again. Ran the “Your call is important to us” gauntlet. Again.. Sadly, in order to fix the account I had to clear security, and since I did not have online access set up, they did not have enough information to clear me. Fair enough, though a bit of a catch-22 situation if you ask me…

I went online and got web access set up. Fast and simple.

Time wasted: 20 minutes.

1/30: Phoned up Customer Support and had them change the name of the account.

At first she said that it could not be done by her; I would have to go into the local branch and get it sorted out there. I persisted and explained what I had been told. She said that she would take care of it. After she put me on hold for a couple of minutes, she told me that the named on the account had been changed (I had asked her to drop my middle initial entirely), and that a new Card would be issued in 7-10 days. Fair enough. I asked if the checks that had been ordered were also corrected, she said that no checks had been ordered.

Finally, she mentioned that a charge for the replacement card may appear on the account (apparently suppressing that charge was not an option at this time). If that happened, I was to call and have it reversed.

Time wasted: 30 minutes.

1/31: Went online and checked my account. Sure enough, there was a pending “Miscellaneous Payment” for $7.50 on the account. Called Customer service again (I now know the number from memory). She told me that she couldn’t do anything about it until the charge had “cleared”.

Time wasted: 10 minutes.

2/1: The charge has now “cleared”, so I phoned up Customer Service again. After the obligatory wait I spoke to a pleasant chap who took my details and put me on hold again. Finally he told me that the charge would be refunded.

Time wasted: 15 minutes.

2/6: My account has received a mysterious credit of $75! A few days ago I transferred $500 from a savings account with a different bank; looks like they thought that it was my paycheck and the $100 bonus was paid as the $75 that the manager was expecting. I spoke to the manager, but she seems convinced that the bonus was $75, not $100.

2/15: Got a letter from the manager, with a form that I need to sign and date, and return to her. A form that I have already signed…

2/20: Dropped by with the form. The manager admitted that I had signed the form but the back office had lost it—kudos to her for honesty. I mentioned the $75/$100 bonus; she remains convinced that it should be only $75.

2/25 My first batch of checks arrives. A large box contains one book of only 30 checks. Talk about cheap.

Bank C - Smooth Operators

About a week after opening my account with Bank B, I was sufficiently browned off by my less-than-salutary experience at their hands to with open a new account elsewhere. A neighbor of mine works for a small local bank that we shall imaginatively call “Bank C”; she was a customer before she was an employee, which is a high recommendation in itself - would you want to work for an outfit that has mistreated you as a customer?

2/2: Milady and I arrived at the bank at 10:45 on a Saturday morning. We were greeted at the door and seconds later we were whisked into the presence of our bank-account-opening person. She was very friendly and professional. After explaining our options, she took copies of our Driving licenses and opened our joint checking account (we decided not to open the savings account yet; there was a $200 minimum balance requirement, and being between paychecks, money was a little tight; we’ll do that later).

There was a $10 setup charge—though you do get a free batch of checks and a $25 bonus every year. I asked if we could specify the starting number, she said “sure”. I asked for the checks to begin at 1626 (our current batch of Bank A checks ends at 1625).

She was very thorough; she went through our automated payments and filled out and gave us paperwork for them “just in case the payee requires something in writing”. It would have been nice to have a folder for all this paperwork, but that is a minor gripe.

Another gripe was that when filling out paperwork the e-statement section was presented as if it was mandatory. I am not averse to electronic statements, but I prefer to have paperwork, all other things being equal. I have found that businesses love it when their customers “go paperless”, because it saves them printing and postage costs to the tune of millions. But so far only one company—Verizon Wireless—has offered to pass some of those cost savings on to their customers. Any road up, I asked if it were possible to receive paper statements; she said yes and crossed out the e-statement section. I am happy.

She also informed me that I would receive an e-mail when my online banking was set up. The entire process took twenty minutes from start to finish.

2/4: My wife received a call from the bank asking if everything was all right and if there was anything they could do for us. This small personal touch goes a long way.

2/6: Received an e-mail letting me know that online banking had been set up. Sign-up took less then ten minutes, most of which was spent choosing a password that was acceptable to both of us.

2/8: Received a card from the bank, hand-signed by the staff, welcoming us.

2/10: A thick envelope arrived in the mail, containing a flattened box and two books of 25 checks, starting with 1626, as promised. Yay

Final thoughts:

Bank A: Buh-bye. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but someday soon and for the rest of your life.

Bank B: Nice website—the best of the three—but too many screw-ups to be trustworthy. I plan on keeping that account open and using it as my tech stash/eBay account (Paypal’s terms and conditions give them the ability to lock the bank account that is linked to a Paypal account, so it pays to not give them the keys to the kingdom), so the effort was not completely wasted.

Bank C: We expect our cars to just work; you turn the key and the engine roars to life. The car takes you where you are going, and you get on with your business. This was the only bank that charged to open an account, which just goes to prove that you get what you pay for. I’m impressed. Good products, good service, nice people to do business with. We all make mistakes, it’s how they are handled that counts. And I get the impression that these folks do things right.

Stimulating thoughts

Much has been made in the media lately about the so-called “Stimulus Package” that has been passed by both sides of the house. Checks will soon be winging their way to a bank account near you.

Otto von Bismarck once said, “There are two things that you should not see being made; laws and sausages“. Just like sausages that can only honestly be described as a “processed meat food product”, the name “Stimulus Package” is one that defies description.

It is technically defined as a “One-time Tax Credit” on our 2008 taxes. Eligibility is based on taxable income; the “rich” won’t get a check. At the other end of the spectrum are those who will get checks but will pay no taxes in 2008.

So… the rich pay in taxes but get no check, while the poor pay no taxes… and get a check anyway! To quote Timon, “Did I miss something?“

Now we’ve dealt with the what, let’s move on to the why. Why are we being sent checks? Apparently the theory is that we will all run out and spend the money on luxury items and thus “stimulate” the economy.

Will the economy be “stimulated” by this extra money? I doubt it. Many will have spent the money before the check has arrived. Others will use it to pay off debts. Still others will save or invest the money. Some will “blow” the money, to be sure, but the impact on the economy will be minimal and short-lived. The phrase “Bandage on a gunshot wound” comes to mind.

What is most amusing about all this is the underlying assumption; that giving people back some of their taxes will stimulate the economy. If this is true, then it follows that abolishing income tax (and replacing it with a purchase tax like the Fair Tax) would result in an economic boom, “the likes of which the world has never seen”. I happen to agree.

The saddest aspect of this whole affair is what our economy has become. It has stopped being about making, building and selling things, and has become based on how much money we spend on crap we don’t need. That is what the economists mean when they say things like “Consumer Spending is down X% on this time last year“.

The last time something like this happened was a few years ago (wasn’t that an election year? Naah… must be a coincidence). Back then it was called a “tax refund”, and some people did not get one.

I remember having to explain to a relative that the reason that she did not receive a tax refund because she had not paid any Federal Taxes. She was not pleased, which I can well understand; however, the principle is easy enough to figure out: A tax refund given to one who did not pay tax is also known as a bribe.

Enjoy!

Head to head to head to head…

Or: “A tale of six headphones”

With all of the headphones I have lying around the house, I thought it would be a good idea to do a head-to-head (no pun intended) comparison. Two are headphones (a band goes around the head), three are earbuds (mount on or around the ear), and one is a set of earphones - they go into the ear canal, like earplugs - also known as “canal-phones”, which sounds too much like waterway communications to me.

The Contestants:

1. Labtec Axis 502: This is my current set of home headphones. Originally bought for the computer, I have found them to be great for general use. Standard “old-skool” headphone design, with an over-the-top band and a boom microphone that can be flipped up so that it lays next to the headband. Lightweight with just the right amount of grip. Boasts about eight feet of cable and an inline volume control that I don’t really use. Having the largest drivers they are the least efficient - they need a lot of power to drive them, and so require higher volume settings than some of the others.
2. Labtec Axis 002: This is actually the LVA-8012, the OEM version of the Axis 002; the main difference being that this one has no in-line volume control. This is my standard work headset; a “Headhugger” design with a band that goes around the back of the head.. It also features a microphone which can be flipped up out of the way. The foam earpads sit on the outside of the ear at what looks like an odd angle, bit sits on the head with just the right amount of pressure. Like the other Labtec it boasts an insanely long cable - about 8′, which can get in the way sometimes, but it also means that I can reach stuff on the other side of my office while wearing them. These are the most comfortable of the lot for me, and it shows - I am onto my third set - I tend to wear these things out every few years and I simply pick another one up on eBay. They are about as efficient as the other Labtecs.
3. Sony MDR-E575: I bought these “Fontopia” (a word which, as far as I can tell, might be Japanese for “absolutely nothing”) earphones maybe twenty years ago back in my Walkman days, and they got a heck of a lot of wear back in the eighties. They spent about fifteen years in a drawer before they were recently returned to active duty. These are the classic black earbuds with little silver accents. Comfortable fit for my ears, but a tendency to slip out. Has a good-sized cable - about 5′ - which is asymmetric, and a beautifully-designed case. To give you an idea of how old they are, they were actually made in Japan. These earphones were made back in the day when the Sony brand meant excellence instead of arrogance, design instead of DRM, quality instead of Rootkits… when the words “It’s a Sony” actually meant something…
4. Sennheiser MX400: I have been a fan of Sennheiser since I was a teenager. My first pair of headphones were Sennheisers - a cheap pair with yellow foam covers and surprisingly good sound that got “Best Budget Buy” reviews from the Hi-fi magazines of the day. After doing a little research, I found out that Sennheiser made earbuds. The nice ones were out of my price range, but the MX400s were inexpensive and got good reviews, so I gave them a try. At $11 shipped on eBay I had little to lose. The packaging was, to put it bluntly, garish - a “Yo Hip Dude” bright orange blister card does not endear your products to the over-40s, but then I suppose I am not yer typical consumer…The phones themselves are somewhat longer and more streamlined than the Sony ones, and a little less discreet. They fit my ears well, though the right one has a tendency to fall out occasionally.A wind-up case is supplied - a useful addition, that serves to protect the headphones while not in use, though it is a little “chunky” and not as well-designed as the Sony. It is also a lot larger than it needs to be, since the cable is only 3.5′ in length and symmetric. A little on the short side, methinks…
5. JVC HA-E200: I bought these for Milady when we were in England. These are “over-the-ear-phones”, which have small rubberized arms that hook over the ear; she prefers these since headphones muss up the hair (something that does not bother me!), earphones don’t fit her cute li’l ears and earbuds are physically painful for her to wear. They’re pink in color, so I tend not to use them very often for reasons that I hope are obvious. No case is supplied, though the main cable retracts into one of the units, which is a cool feature. I just wish that they did the same thing with the cable between the two units.
6. Skullcandy Smokin’ Buds Ink’d: Having never tried earbuds (the ones that go into your ear like earplugs) before, I saw these going for ten bucks from my local Circuit City, so I thought I would give them a go. Comes with three different sizes of silicon plugs, the smallest of which fit my ears. Surprisingly, no case; this is not a big deal, as they are so small and only a 3′ cable they will stow in a pocket, but I doubt that they will last long without some kind of protection. SkullCandy’s website is slow and complex, with plenty of pictures of “Yo hip dudes”, usually on skateboards hovering six feet in the air. And this product was not on their website.

The Test:

The test rig for this comparison is my handy-dandy thrifty-nifty trusty-rusty iPod Classic 4G 40GB. No equalization was used. For the test I tried to find “real” sounds - acoustic instruments and voices, along with pieces with lots of detail…

• Vivaldi - Four Seasons/Spring. (Nothing like a bit of classical for a true objective comparison…)
• Charlotte Church/Carrickfergus (lush orchestration and that wonderful voice…)
• Joe Jackson/Breaking us in two (Great use of percussion. Watch for the low-flying bongos on the right!)
• David Arkenstone/The Turning of the year (Some great acoustic and synth work. A good tune, too.)
• Michael W. Smith/Freedom (nothing like a full symphony going at it full-bore. Watch for the “drums… drums in the deep” in the second half of the piece)
• Mike Oldfield/The Voyager (Multi-layered Irish Drumming, bagpipes and electric guitar)
• Acoustic Alchemy/Lazeez (nice guitar work, pardner!)
• Kathy Troccoli/Psalm Twenty-Three (Lots of detail and multi-layered vocals… watch for the triangle on the left!)
• Bee Gees/Spirits Having Flown (Cheesy, but has some nice synth/string work. True story: The first time I heard this was on a set of Wharfedale E70 speakers at a hi-fi show. I instantly fell in love with… the speakers!)
• Chris De Burgh/Diamond in the Dark (low drums and female “sigh”… very atmospheric), Rivers of Abraham (Lower vocals and general “pop muzik” test)
• ELO/Stranger & So Serious & Secret Messages (Just cos I like ELO…)
• Queen/A Winter’s Tale (Sung by a dying man through a great deal of pain. We miss you Freddie…)

All songs are 320kbps MP3s

The Results:

Labtec Axis 502: Sound is bright, open and spacious. Vivaldi sounded like he meant business, bass was tight and pronounced but not overwhelming, high-end percussion is clear. That’s the way (uh-huh uh-huh) I like it (uh-huh uh-huh). Help! I’m trapped in the Seventies and I can’t get out..!

Labtec Axis 002: A slightly brighter sound, Bass is on the light side, but comfortable and easy on the ears. Sound is detailed and precise. Sound is almost as good as the 502s, but this one is more comfortable and does not mess with the ‘do…

Sony: More pronounced Bass, but it is imprecise and loses some of it’s “tightness”; mid-range is lacking in punch. Treble is lacking; it sounds almost underwater. After the last two this one was actually quite unpleasant. It pains me to think that once upon a time I actually thought that this sounded ok. But then I was young and did not know any better… Not available anymore, which might be a mercy.

Sennheiser: Well-balanced sound. more pronounced, tighter bass and clearer treble, though a little muffled at the high end. There were details that I could hear with these that were simply missing from the Sony.

JVC: The polar opposite of the Sony. This has the brightest sound of the lot; almost shrill at times. Not very efficient - needs lots of volume, but for those who prefer clarity to loudness, that is no bad thing. Sound is bright, clear and detailed, but lacking in bass and the lower vocal registers.

SkullCandy: If you like bass, this is the one. Lots of tight, low harmonics that are not obvious with the others come to the fore with this one. Drums, Cellos and Bass guitars sound floor-shakingly great, and male vocals are well-defined.

Moving up the midrange, it’s a different story. Piano and female vocals are a little muted. The bad news is that the high-end is conspicuous by its absence. Classical, and Jazz sound poor and the rest is lacking in openness and what I would call “fizz”; so I guess this one was not designed with the audiophile in mind.

Another issue is that unlike all of the other headphones I reviewed, when wearing these the music sounds like it is coming from “inside your head”. This is probably because the drivers are actually inside your head, or it may be because of the “closed” nature of in-ear phones.

Another oddity is that there is no way to tell left from right! Apparently Skullcandy thinks that today’s “Yo Hip Dude/tte” does not care for these things; I do. A spot of nail polish should take care of that, though it really should not be necessary…

Unlike all of the others in this test, these earbuds block out a lot of the external sounds, which makes it useful in noisy situations such as mowing the lawn or taking a flight. There is also a lot of percussive “cable noise” whenever you move your head or tap on the cable.

One redeeming feature is that the “ear-plug” nature is that you can hear yourself singing… and you will very quickly find out if you are off key! Given the miniscule size of the drivers, efficiency is unsurprisingly high; not much volume required to drive these things.

The Final Verdict:

There is nothing like a good set of “cans”, big headphones that fit over the ears, block out all extraneous sound and regale the wearer with big sound from huge drivers. However, such headphones are impractical unless you are an audiophile or work in a recording studio. All of these headphones are compromises between practicality and sound quality.

Labtec Axis-502
These are the closest things I have to a “reference” set of headphones; they set the standard by which I judge all the others. And to a greater or lesser extent, all come up short.

Labtec LVA-8012
Light, comfortable, with a crisp, clear sound. The long cable is a plus in the office and a minus on the street. When this one dies I will buy another. Nuff said.

Sennheiser
Not as comfortable or good-sounding as either of the above two, but they are a heck of a lot more portable. The case fits nicely in one’s pocket without ruining the line of one’s trousers.

JVC
These were bought in London, and it shows: It seems that audio products aimed at the European and Asian markets are less bass-heavy than their American counterparts.

Sony
These are a throwback to the old days when manufacturers used to slap the word “Digital” on everything. By today’s standards, sound is poor.

Skullcandy Smokin’ Buds
I really wanted to like these earphones, but the way things are I could not bring myself to use them for serious listening to music. In terms of sound quality they leave something to be desired. Their small size and closed design make these the ones I would want to take on a plane, and they have become the earphones of choice for watching movies on my Palm or listening to podcasts, but but in most other situations they offer little to redeem them.

A tale of two sandwiches…

I have not eaten at McDonald’s for many moons; the last time was about six months ago, when I grabbed a couple of Filets-o-fish™ on the way home. When I got them home I was incensed to find that they had spent too much time under a warmer and had dried out; I had to go back and get replacements.

Last night, as I was heading home from Chicago, I was hungry. This was hardly surprising; it was about 4PM, and I had not eaten since breakfast. On the freeway I tend to prefer Chick-Fil-A, Wendy’s or Steak-and-Shake. I usually get a chicken or fish sandwich. I also like Arby’s’ Beef-and-cheddar, but I don’t think it likes my arteries very much. However, none of these were in evidence on this particular stretch of freeway.

When I stopped to get some petrol, I wandered over to the McDonald’s that was attached to the filling station. I decided to “treat” myself to one of their new “Premium” crispy chicken sandwiches. Milady wanted something hot to drink, so I grabbed a cup of coffee for her and a helping of fries for my two-year-old God-son.

Back on the freeway, I took a bite of my chicken sandwich. It was very “dry”. A closer examination revealed a rubbery piece of chicken that tasted like cardboard. There was very little mayonnaise on it. The result was almost inedible; I got about half-way through it before I gave up in disgust.

Half an hour later I stopped at a Wendy’s, where I purchased a Crispy chicken sandwich and threw away the remainder of my McCardboard™ Sandwich and Milady’s coffee, which turned out to be horrible (this is not McDonald’s fault; their coffee is always horrible, but we were desperate…). At first bite I knew that I had a winner. The chicken was hot - straight out of the fryer, and tasted crispy on the outside, soft and moist on the inside. As I ate, my brain reflected that the grilled chicken would have been kinder to my arteries, while my stomach said “Mmmmm… fried chicken!”

So… what have I learned? Well, it seems that McDonald’s still keeps food under warmers for way too long. I have also come up with an idea for a corporate slogan for McDonald’s at a petrol station: “Gas for you and your car“

The final score, Wendy’s 1, McDonald’s 0.

 

Now Reading: QBQ! By John G. Miller

Why Content is no longer King

In Act I: Sumner Redstone doesn’t get it, we see an old geezer who came from a movie-theater background to head up Viacom, a movie conglomerate, boldly declare If Content Is King, Copyright Is Its Castle. He actually believes that - Viacom is currently suing YouTube (owned by Google) for Billions of Dollars. This suit has no base, due to Viacom’s fundamental misunderstanding about what Copyright is, and what it isn’t.

What Copyright is, is a limited exclusive right to commercially exploit one’s work. What is isn’t is a semi-permanent right of ownership and the consequent ability to prohibit use of the work in any shape, form or fashion, which is what Redstone and his ilk seem to believe.

YouTube has become immensely popular because it allows people to express themselves by posting their own videos, including mashups - pastiches of material that may include copyrighted work, along with clips, trailers, parodies etc.

While Viacom are obviously welcome to ask YouTube to remove genuine examples of infringement - where, for instance, enough of a work is posted to threaten the Copyright Holder’s right to make money - I have yet to see an example of this. Indeed, Viacom seem to believe that YouTube has to pay them for the right to “Our Stuff”, while failing to realize that YouTube is actually doing them a favor by providing free word-of-mouth.

In Act II: A lawyer who gets it, we see a communications lawyer with a remarkably mature grasp of the situation. The only thing that I would add is that as a result of decades of lobbying by the content industry, Copyright Periods are now way too long. For example, I recently read a book called “The Richest Man in Babylon”, which was written in 1926… and is still under copyright over eight years later.

This is clearly ridiculous. How long they should be depends on the medium. I would suggest Five years for movies and TV shows and twenty-five years for books.

Finally, in Act III: The future of Copyright, we see that the copyright laws are archaic and largely irrelevant in the digital age. Professor Larry Lessig of Stanford University gives a fascinating talk on “How creativity is being strangled by the law“. The fact that this part contains a clip that I personally find offensive just goes to show that everyone has the right to make an ass* of himself in public, which is one of the freedoms we in America hold most dear.

In conclusion, Mr Redstone, content is not king. It never was.

The Customer is king, and always has been.

You sir, and your cohorts seem to have forgotten that. But then, coming from the theater business it is easy for you to keep yourselves in the dark.

I’m just glad that Shakespeare did not patent the three-act play when he had the chance.

* A word that means “Donkey”. Any other use is prohibited, or at least in very poor taste.

I listen, therefore iPod

If you had told me three years ago that mine would be a two-iPod household, I would have doubted your sanity. I would have told you that Apple’s dedication to DRM would forever render the presence of an iPod in my life as an impossibility.

That was before a relative gave Milady a 2GB black iPod Nano that he wasn’t using. Funny how deeply-held convictions can melt in the face of free stuff, isn’t it?

When the CD player in my car quit working, I took to borrowing her iPod for trips to work. I got quite attached to the little gizmo. It soon reached the point that she rarely got to use it anymore, and when she did, she inevitably found out that it was full of the weird stuff that I preferred. We both agreed that I needed an iPod of my own. But 2GB was not enough. Neither was 4 or even 8.

You see, my music collection weighed in at about 27GB.

The problem was that the big iPods cost a lot of money; too much for me. After a few weeks of research, I snagged a used 40GB one from eBay for $71+shipping. I hope to get two good years out of it before upgrading again.

The purists among you may point out that I have sold out to Apple’s DRM lock-in, but I would point out that of my collection consists of approximately 2800 MP3s and precisely three songs purchased from the iTunes Store. Songs I could not easily get legitimately from elsewhere.

Like the iPod itself, the iTunes store “just works”. It is easy to purchase and download a song - even if I still think that 99c/song is too high (and the record companies think is too low). And if the DRM does prove too onerous, it is easy enough to break - for my own use, of course. Problem solved.

And Milady has her iPod back.

Winners and Losers

Last night I went into my local Kroger’s to buy some lactose-free milk.

I initially balked at the price - nearly $4 for a half-gallon carton - but I don’t mind paying more for better service, so I grabbed one and headed to the checkouts.

Only three cashers were on duty.
The lines were long.
The U-scans were broken; they do not accept cash.
They have been broken since the store opened about a year ago.

If I am going to pay the cashier, I am not using U-scan.
And if I want to stand in line I will shop at Wal-Mart.

So I put the milk back in the cooler and went to the Meijer’s a little farther down the road.
There, I purchased their store brand milk for $2.80.
And did not have to stand in line.

Kroger’s:
FIX YOUR BLOODY U-SCANS OR REPLACE THEM!
I ain’t shopping there again until you do.
And make sure that you ALWAYS have enough cashiers.
You lose.

Meijer’s: You won. Keep it up!

Arrr!

It’s “International Talk Like a Pirate day”

Enjoy.