Craigslist Computer Listings – a Translation Guide for Beginners

  • “Desperately seeking a laptop. Must be recent and must have wireless. Willing to pay $100.”

I am delusional.

  • “Looking for Macbook. Must be recent and must be cheap”

I don’t want to work like a millionaire, I just want to look like one.

  • “Looking for legit Windows Cheap”

Da Windoze i got from da Torrentz last year iz not legit and Micro$oft iz on my azz! Dey sez i am a pirate – Oh Noes! i needz ta get a legit version quick – and i STILL dozn’t want to pay da munniez for it.

  • “Nearly new laptop, cost me $X, selling for $X-50”

I am under the illusion that a computer is some kind of investment. I am hoping that you are willing to forgo return privilege, New-Computer-Experience and original-purchaser-only warranty for a mere fifty bucks.

  • “Labtop for sale”

I am a bloody idiot.

 

Now you know…

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